5 years and 3 months of loving this man. And after all that time…he reminded me that lust is what kept him there. My first love had told me that there was nothing like the feel of ‘her’ but I thought that’s what all firsts say since he broke her in. But now it had been reconfirmed by my second love. Instead of spitting in his face…I’ve decided to take this show on the road. Someone else will not only love the feel of her but will actually love her…through every moist experience she shares and every climax that she brings into this world. Someone will love HER.
As I watched you load up your car, I thought…‘my God I raised a beautiful and strong black woman.’ And I stood back in amazement…feeling blessed to be your mother.
Saying goodbye to a person after they have grossly mistreated you is easy. It’s saying goodbye to the dreams you had when things were great that becomes…haunting.
Allowing yourself to be healed is in itself a difficult task. You have to admit you have been hurt and then be willing to entrust your scars to another….hoping and praying that they will not reopen old wounds.
Last night’s episode of Scandal was deep. So many things flooded my mind. One thing stood out: Mellie’s position. Let me start off by saying I’m Team Olivia AND Team Mellie. I never felt the need to choose. So much I love and hate about them both. However, last night I could identify with Mellie the most. There she was…this amazingly beautiful and complex woman…faced with some difficult choices. She stood by this man “come hell come high water” and she was now being put out to pasteur like yesterday’s used up cash cow. Leaving any home would be hard but leaving the White House must be particularly painful. I’ve faith she will be back as Madame President though! Now back to her position. I wish that someone would have told me what I’m about to tell you in my freshman year of college. Every woman, whether she be deemed weak or strong, will have moments in love where she feels she sold her soul to the devil. Even a strong woman will have days when she feels she sold her love cheaply. There Mellie was….hurt and abused yet filled with strength! I’ve been there recently. Cried almost once a week through the summer and praying that the Lord deliver me from this “situationship” I had put myself in. I felt disrespected and less than at times. It was like he was crushing my spirit. I’m not even sure if he was doing it purposely or if he had been so use to me giving all my love away so cheaply that I signed up to be forgotten and then treated like an after thought. I don’t think he ever really looked at me as he stepped over my body…metaphorically of course. In his only defense…I set the bar for what my love was worth. He was never in the position to set that price. Everything he took from me carelessly…I gave willingly and so did Mellie! So she is right…she deserves more! But not because of what she gave willingly…she deserves more because she is taking back her power over herself and setting the price for what she is now worth! My guess is she is….priceless! Strong women will have similar moments but we must always go back to the drawing board (or in a brand new relationship) and demand our worth! No one sets the price for what you are worth but YOU. And even in those moments of sadness…moments of second guessing yourself….allow yourself to be human and know that you are doing the best you can. Strength is not about avoiding hurt….strength is in picking up the pieces, rebuilding, and demanding your worth. So to the future Madame President and all the women in a similar position please sing: “You did not break me
I’m still fighting for peace
Well, I’ve got thick skin and an elastic heart,
But your blade – it might be too sharp
I’m like a rubber band until you pull too hard,
Yeah, I may snap and I move fast
But you won’t see me fall apart
‘Cause I’ve got an elastic heart
I’ve got an elastic heart
Yeah, I’ve got an elastic heart” ~SIA. Writer’s Note: In French, Madame refers to a married woman while Madam is the mistress of a household.
~KJM still high off of Scandal
I’m convinced that everything good in this world is connected to the orgasm. And that everything bad is either connected to a limp dick or cobwebs.
Everyone has a friend or two who just blurts out unsolicited advice all the time. It’s one thing if you asked for their honest advice. You can’t get mad at their response because you asked! It’s another thing when you just want them to listen. Most of the time I just want someone to just listen to me. I’m strong willed enough to find my own way. Anyway…..here’s 10 Things that You should Know about these Unsolicited Fuck Tarts:
10. They are usually very unhappy people. Hence, why they have time to comment on every aspect of your life.
9. Their lives are usually a mess…especially their personal lives. I once had a “friend” tell me that the guy I was dating would eventually leave me for a younger woman just like her boyfriend did to her. I hated to tell her that her and I were NOT aging the same and that we were seeing two totally different type of men.
8. These people cannot keep a spouse happy to save their lives! Think about it…if they are always calling you to hear every detail of your life….someone else that may need their attention is being neglected.
7. They are usually in worst situations than the one they are currently giving you advice on.
6. They are usually lonely or a door mat for someone else yet are trying to live vicariously through you.
5. They may be jealous of you and how you live your life.
4. There’s no way in hell they would actually do what they are advising you to do!
3. They may be mentally unstable or depressed. Some people are just clinical.
2. They are not a real friend if they try to control your life, cut you off if you ignore their unsolicited advice, spread your business to others, or try to put you down when you do what’s right for yourself.
And 1. This is the most important thing to remember….these people have a piss poor sex life! Because if they were “laying the pipe” or getting their “50 Shades of Grey” on….there’s no way in hell they would have time to be up in your Vicky Secrets! A good climax has no time for gossip. Multiple orgasms do not have time to pick up the phone and listen to other people’s business. They are too busy cuming! Well I’m off to experience my next orgasm! Hope this was helpful! ~KJM telling people who give unsolicited advice to fuck off…literally!
There’s something about him. I can’t put my finger on it. I’m suppose to be so closed off after being hurt. Instead I’m so open and ready for him to lead us. I miss him after just one minute of leaving him. Sometimes I turn back….just to kiss him once more. Once more…it’s like I can see the words hanging over my head. Saying….kiss him passionately….once more.
I’m touched. First date. Deep conversation. Had he ever been in love? Yes….twice. We were in a quiet restaurant drinking wine and beer as I asked him his deepest secrets. He responded by slipping his hands in between my legs. I’m touched and climaxing right there at the bar. People laughing and talking around us as I cum. I want to resist because that’s what good girls do. We don’t cum in bars as we whisper into the ears of a potential partner. His hand is getting deeper. Touching a part of me that has not been touched in years. I yearned to be wanted. It’s been so long since I’ve been touched. He’s…taking…me….there. I’m touched and I want him. Climaxing and thinking I have to have him. I’m in trouble. Too soon to be touched. ~KJM after our official first date
Eyes meet even though I’m trying to avoid his deep gaze. He wants to taste me. I know this because his eyes are asking permission. And I want to hold off. Eyes meet again only now he’s pulling me close. Lips meet. No lips lock. He’s…tasting….me….and I’m…breathing….him. Eyes closed. Our tongues are speaking…anticipating. He tastes like home. Like home on a stormy day. Like listening to the rain falling on a summer day from my bedroom window. There’s a deep yearning. The kind I never even knew existed. We are now tasting, breathing, and enticing each other….